Service

Altruism is apparently not inherent, so says an economist named John List. Instead, one might suggest that altruism in its purest form is rare and that greed is inherent. I suppose that to answer this question we have to get to the root of why someone commits an act of service, or why someone gives (regardless of time, services or money). The suggestion by this economist is that people give (in this country primarily) in order to get something in return, regardless of the benefit, and not just to feel better.

The idea is that thanks to generous tax deductions and notoriety for having given something, people are attracted more to the idea of what you get when you give than what the receiver gets. Taken into proper context it would seem that anyone who gives sees greater value in the financial post benefit than the gift itself.

Explaining this shows us that we see little benefit to the recipient of any gift. When we give something away we seem to disregard the feelings and interests of who we give to almost as if they have no face or name. We don't give to unknown buildings and countries without citizens, we give to individuals. When we give there is a face and a name attached and at times there is a real need for that gift.

We cannot take the humanity out of giving and to that end, we can honestly say that the suggestion of greed being inherent as opposed to altruism is questionable, to say the least. It doesn't take much to see need and many people in many countries respond when there is a crisis. It may be true that here in America we see a back end benefit to our generosity but the first thought that enters your mind when you hear of or see a crisis is one of compassion and not of your tax deductible gift.

I have often wondered what our giving would look like if there were no tax benefits. Mr. List’s study shows us what regular people in real world situations would do, or so he claims. What does not enter in that study (the “Director” analysis) is any background information of any of the test subjects (who are mostly college students by the way). Another major problem is the study only uses a small microcosm of the population to study a vast array of humanity, across races, ethnicities, creeds, religious beliefs, socio-economic makeup and possibly the biggest contributing factor; how someone was raised in relation to giving.

It is easy to pick apart an analysis by anyone, but in this case I seek more to question the very concept of altruism and service to others, rather than the idea that we tend to give because of the financial benefit we receive.

Consider this; when you give anything to anyone, you are committing an act of service. Call it goodwill to men, call it civic duty; call it what you like but there is an action taking place and that action is called service. Interestingly, when you join the military you are often referred to as being in the service. In this case your service is to your country and your commander in chief, as well as to your family and friends. That is a mighty act of service and there are many others like it.

Regardless of the service there is always a sacrifice on the part of the person serving. Whether time or money or a lifetime, we make a choice to sacrifice something when we give; when we serve others. If greed was inherent, we would never serve unless there was a benefit for us and I promise you that nothing would be accomplished in this place. We would melt into beating each other senseless to gain our glory. There would be no concern for others if greed was indeed inherent.

This should be good news for anyone reading this. Service to others is possible on a daily basis, from small things to life changing events. Our very lives can be in constant service from sun up to sun down, making a difference in lives across all spectrums.

why do you?

Why do you do what you do? Think about your daily routine, the steps you take as you first awake to the point when you lie down again. For some people those are drastic steps. I think about those in the military or those on rotation at a hospital. I think of police officers and fire fighters and folks who work the swing shift. Then of course there are the millions who slog through their day with such similarity that if we were able to shift a few thousand faces around they might not be able to tell the difference.

So you have a mental picture painted of your day, so to speak; now answer the question. Why do you do what you do? This is not meant to be vague but exploratory. If you go for the pat answer that you do it for the money, then so be it. Maybe you do it for the fame or the notoriety, if so then good for you. Whatever the reason, I know you have one. But here is the concerning thought; you do what you do because it's what you've done for quite some time now. If this is so then you, my friend, are in a rut.

Could you pull yourself out of that rut if you wanted to? Early pioneers that traveled west often came in wagons. The trails they carved created ruts because of the wagon wheels. The earliest explorers made their own way but those that followed did so by staying in the ruts of the wagons that had gone before. In some cases, ruts were so deep that even if a family or group wanted to change course, they couldn't because they could not lift their wagon out of the rut and they would travel for hundreds of miles because of it.

The ruts we get ourselves in are often because of a similar nature, but instead of a tangible track we can see, there is often a psychological road that we travel…one that we would have a very difficult time of getting off of unless something drastic happened.

The drastic is our worst nightmare. No one wants it but we all know it's possible. Career plans get altered, medical crises happen, people die...things change. The inevitable is that we will all face something like this in our lifetime; some folks will endure changes like this many times. In those instances we find ourselves out of the routine, out of the mundane, away from the norm and of course; out of a rut.

Another truth in all of this is that some folks actually like being in a rut. The simplicity of a routine is easy to follow, almost mindless if you will. If your day to day can occur without much thought, the idea is that you have more capacity to concentrate on different things. The unfortunate thing is here that very few people have that kind of capacity, or choose to use it. Most people exist in that mindless place and become complacent, not because they are stupid but because they are lazy. Getting out of a rut will always take a great deal of work and often some sacrifice.

Our lives are full of choices but most of them are like rhetorical questions; we know the answers. The occasional tough question that comes along may jar us from our routine for a moment but it will not derail us. There are only two ways to get out of a rut; circumstances that are beyond your control or a conscience decision on your part followed by the actions necessary to complete the change.

I would hate to suggest that your rut is a bad thing but often it is unhealthy. Consider for a moment that the reason you do what you do is because you have not thought of any good alternatives. Now would be a good time to think of options. The main reason for this is the fact that if you don’t, that unforeseen circumstance is waiting right around the corner. Our ruts are our own doing and unless we plan ahead, it is quite possible that we will travel for hundreds of miles with little to no choice.

I get why you do what you do….do you?

finding time

For the last year I have been working two jobs (well almost). There was a 4 month stint in there where the jobs were sporadic, to say the least. Last summer I took a part time gig to supplement my income and here we are again in summer, a year wiser but still working two jobs. I remember trying this juggling act back in college and thinking, dude, this is nuts.

God knows I have a hard time saying no to anything and amidst these two jobs I find there is little free time to be had, but I am always looking for some. This past spring was probably the hardest on me that I have ever experienced and after pulling through it I was left to question why, yet I continue down the road of assent.

In the craziness of it all I have discovered that saying yes to so many different responsibilities can also mean saying yes to free time. I am the consummate master of telling myself there will be time for everything, but reality always reminds me that time yields to no man. So finding time for me becomes a task of sorts, kind of like writing date nights on the calendar. This matter should be open and closed but I can't escape the idea that I am missing something that I haven't made time for.

My case is not unlike most, I just don't air the majority of it via Facebook; no need (and no time). What irks me however is how glib some are that could be doing so much more and yet just waste away while telling the world how busy they are. Oh crap, there I go whining again, sorry.

Finding time is recognizing that we are all living on a limited supply, then maximizing every last second. It is saying yes to playing catch with your kid even after a long day of work, even when you would rather collapse on the sofa. It is making an effort in the lives of everyone around you, even when you know that half of them would rather not hear from you at all. It is listening when you would rather speak.

Moving Christianity into Western thought…

For so long, we as Americans have believed that while Christ died for our sins, we are somehow detached from His commission because this country was founded on the belief that religious oppression included something we left behind in the Old World. Americans embrace a New World philosophy where apparently we are supposed to be “free” from oppression and persecution.

With that in mind, fundamentalists are adamant about protecting that particular freedom as truly American, and a God given right. We move through life, generation after generation, upholding a belief that somehow being an American frees us from suffering for Christ (Philippians 1:27-30).

Instead of gaining freedom from sin through Christ’s life, death and resurrection, we claim freedom by honoring the lives, and more importantly the deaths, of military men and women who supposedly grant us freedom.

But what does that freedom look like? Does it free us from eternal damnation or from sin? The claim is that we are freed from tyranny, right? Christians were persecuted (and still are) in the Old World, but American Christians believe that persecution has no place in their New World.

Christ Himself came to restore and give us new life, and all because of a grace that we could never understand. We celebrate that restoration by giving up our old ways and our old lives in order to live victoriously in Him. Our commission is to share that very news.

The contradiction for American Christians comes when we celebrate a freedom that is born out of death and nothing more. It happens when we rally around a freedom that is represented by man made accomplishments and man made documents. Americanism is all about what we have done and not so much about what our heavenly Father has done for us by His grace.

Leave it to man to circumvent God in an effort to be the top dog, especially an American man. The very image of an American man is one of rugged determination and grit, of steel jaws and raw nerves. Someone who doesn’t back down from a fight and never gives up. This image is powerful and it tends to draw every American in with the understanding that if you do not relate to this rugged American man, you must be either a traitor or a foreigner. Lately, you might be branded a terrorist.

The problem is that when the rubber meets the road and eternity is on the line, who are you going to trust; the military man with his big gun, or God Almighty?

Western thought (or Americanism) is relatively new in the grand scheme of things, especially that of philosophy and the understanding of the human mind. How any one group of citizens could have strayed this far in such a short amount of time is boggling but my inference is meant to elicit a question for each of us, and not meant to confuse or lead to more thought. The question is actually a simple one and it is this; who do you serve?

Take time to answer the question and do not jump to conclusions. It is easy to suggest that you serve God but I beg you to look at your life and examine what other forces are at work. What role does money play in your life? How about your job or your hobbies? Even your family focus needs to be looked at.

Most importantly, the object of this post is to examine what being an American means to you. I have written about this topic three times before and in those cases I pointed to the need for examination. You can keep blaming the other side if you want, keep pointing fingers, keep slapping “support our troops” bumper stickers on your car, but in the end God is going to expect much more from His children than silly rants on Facebook or catchy little Twitter slogans.

Move forward in your faith, but remember that in order to do so takes some bold thought. Redefining Western thought is an imperative but before we can even touch that one we have to redefine the priorities in our own lives. Examine yourselves by asking God for wisdom as James directs us. Then, turn your thoughts into actions that are truly beneficial to His kingdom, and not this one.

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My life is not mine, and yet it is mine to live for Him. Peace to you all.

D

soccer dad

We have all heard the term ‘soccer mom’ but when was the last time you heard someone refer to himself as a soccer dad? You might think this is some new age terminology but the truth is that dads have long been attending soccer matches for their kids but it is often the mom who, being a stay at home mother, totes the kids to matches along with their friends and then hangs out with other like minded mothers.

There is nothing wrong with this picture, that of a soccer mom, but what does the picture say regarding dad? For years we have established that dads didn’t always make soccer games because of work or other responsibilities (such as golf with buddies), but for the last 15 years that I have been standing on the sideline, mostly as a coach, the signs are clear; dads are at the games.

Adding to participation rates of dads is our current economy, which has seen a rise in women maintaining positions in the work place while men lose their jobs or they work part time. This of course frees up men to take more of an active role in things like soccer games, but even with that, when was the last time you heard a guy declare himself a soccer dad?

So let me openly use the term for all to hear (and read); I am a soccer dad. I for one am grateful for the opportunities I get to spend with my kids, and being out there for them as they play sports is a real joy. I watch them work hard to impress me when they know that I am watching and I get a kick out of seeing them interact with other kids that are doing the exact same thing. Watching all of this play out seems so natural to me but I remind myself that it has not always been this way.

Thinking back to my playing days as a young boy, I remember my dad being there occasionally but I also remember feeling like he was out of place. There were always dads at the games but something feels different about then versus now. Possibly it is my involvement in the game (I coach, oversee the local parks & rec. soccer program and also play), but I wonder what these times say about soccer dads today as opposed to 35 years ago?

If you asked either of my kids what their dad does for work, they might slip up and say, “he’s a soccer coach”, or “he coaches other soccer coaches”. And while I do have a job that pays me, the truth is that a large portion of my life is taken up by soccer, so the term “soccer dad” fits. But that term is of greater significance to me when I remember that I am a dad first and soccer comes second. Watching my kids tear after the ball is a joyous thing and I relish those moments, even when they get down on themselves for not being as good as they think they should be.

For those of us that have embarked on this privileged journey of fatherhood, we know that there are moments of brilliance followed by trials of uncertainty, both on the part of our kids and ourselves. Whether your sport is soccer or your place of involvement is the science lab (science dad?), we have such an awesome responsibility to be a part of the lives of our kids. To me, being a dad is sharing with my kids all of the experiences that have shaped me from childhood, while also sharing the unique lives of my kids as they share with me.

Being a soccer dad is just one way that I am privileged as a father. Watching as one of my kids scores a goal and then turns to celebrate with both hands in the air, the greatest moment for me comes from seeing them revel in their own accomplishment, then looking at me with that infamous face that screams, “did you see that dad?”

Yea, I’m a soccer dad.

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My life is not mine, and yet it is mine to live for Him. 
Peace to you all.

D